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Francine Caitlyn Chye
a.k.a. Hurricaine Fran
a.k.a. Fran the PCD
a.k.a. the happy bunny :D
<3
040889 (August baby!)
Crescent, ACJC, hocker
xoxo
If it's meant to be, it'll be(:
"And sometimes good things fall apart
so better things can fall together"
don't think, just run
Tuesday, April 25, 2006
I resisted again yesterday. Was it just me willing myself to fall, was he pushing me, or was the Holy Spirit really coursing all through my entire being, whispering urgently to let go, to lean back, to fall? No one will ever know. As i fell back, back down down down, i just gave up everything to Him, i just let it all go. The exhaustion, the fear, the hurt, the memories, the want, the confusion, the need, the loneliness, the stress. Lying there felt right. Cold floor underneath my body, sprawled out nicely, breathing in, breathing out. I found my peace right there on the floor. To be able to have had, finally, a chance to fall. And boy, did it feel good.
I don't know what's going on, but my heart's still pounding.
AC Girls Hockey played PJC today. We needed the win, we had the fire, the determination, we had it all. Rested, concentrating, composed and confident we stepped onto the pitch. Warm up was good, sufficient, essential. We started well-strong, calm. One half went by, no goals scored. Second half, sticks lower, running faster, stronger, dragging. Then the short corner came by. Luddy passed a good, flat, strong pass to Clare, Clare stops, pauses, hits. BAM! Silence. Everyone turns, looks up. Ball's in the goal. SCREAMS ((((((((((((:
And THAT, is how AC Hocks do it. -GRINS. GL to the boys tmr! Bring back the victory. I can't wait for Friday now (: GOOD GAME GIRLS. Loves. (:
In a matter of the shortest while, you've managed to bring me way back to August of '04. I don't know what's going on, i don't know how you're feeling, i don't know what you want. I don't even know what i want anymore. I thought i had moved on, let go, forgotten or not cared. I thought i had grown past the aches and smiles. Apparently i haven't. I don't know how much i can give until you break me again. Such a big part of me is just anticipating the future hurt that's just around the river bend, yet every bone,nerve,drop of blood in me is screaming for more, more, more. Why am i still stuck on those stupid, stupid conversations? Why is it that the only thought running through my mind is that you're still the only one? I feel like throwing everything down, turning around and walking away, for fear of bitter endings. At the same time, you still take my breath away and somehow that makes up for all the tears. Maybe it's only ever been you.. But can i handle any more?
don't lead me on only to break me up.
-all i wanna do it lie on my bed and smile.
ex-oh, ex-oh
1:05 AM
